We all love a good rant or a little bit of controversy but it looks like YouTube star and Comedian Nicole Arbour has taken it a step too far with her video “Dear Fat People”. The title says enough, right?
Throughout the video Arbour talks about her experiences with people that are overweight, making statements like “Fat-shaming is not a thing. Fat people made that up. If we offend you so much that you lose weight, I’m OK with that. You are killing yourself,” I won’t go into anything else that she said, as the video received over 21 million views – I think that’s enough publicity missy I’m not giving you any more.
What I really wanted to talk about is body shaming, fat shaming is equally as derogatory as skinny shaming, making someone’s size or shape the center of mockery or shame is body shaming. In the media we’ve seen how slimmer women are put against bigger or curvier women like Meghan Trainor’s All About That Base which was an example of body shaming in order to make the ‘other’ look or feel better. The “real woman = curvy woman” talk is crap as well as the skinny woman is the ideal woman; the physical is used to define what a real woman is, we are truly living in a world where intellect and personality is disregarded.
However, this shouldn’t be the case. The question we should be asking ourselves is: are we staying healthy? Healthy comes in many sizes. The fact is if women were to eat healthier some would be slimmer and some would actually gain weight, in my fantasy/insecure world I would love to do both – gain weight on my lumps and bumps and lose weight on my waist and stomach ! LOL. I’m not even close to that fantasy- but I’m okay with that.
As I’ve just told you what my ‘ideal’ body looks like, I’ve realised it’s actually what I think people admire. But I don’t owe these people anything and I don’t know most of them. These people I’m referring to are followers and ‘friends’ on social media. Social media has heightened the obsession with perfection and impression on people who see us. We’re all in this bubble together, nobody important enough is sitting on a panel looking at your selfies and #OOTD‘S to see if you’re good enough to go to the next round – it’s not the #XFactor.
As women and men we should be the ones to decide what is best for us in terms of our own appearance. I also believe that we have a right to see people and make our own judgements on what we see which is not the same as using words to deflate ones confidence but to embrace our differences.
Lastly, back to the subject of body shaming, If you’re going to say something controversial make sure it’s equally intelligent.